Gratefulness

Its not possible to be grateful for some things, like untimely death, war, disparity in wealth and opportunities, and so on... And i haven't found it possible to be grateful all the time. I have it in my mind that 'i should be more grateful.' Every day it is my practice to try and see the gift in things, in people, in situations, and it can be tiresome, especially when i'm not feeling it...

But the it pays off! I mean, it builds up, rather, and it eventually overflows in authentic true thankfulness. Its a practice i highly recommend to anyone wishing to experience joy and... grace.

My friend had a quote in her living room that said 'there is always something to be grateful for... always" and yes, mentally, intellectually, you can always make a list

i'm grateful for water, for air, for great food, for supportive parents, for a healthy child, for my future opportunities, for my past mistakes from which i've learned, for the mistakes i'll make in the future from which i'll learn, for my future successes, for my past successes, for this planet, for my friends, for the people i will meet, et cetera in finitum

But the feeling is what i'm really after. The above mentioned are simply content-material, intended to provoke a feeling. For example, i can provoke sadness by telling you a story about a man and a woman who met when they were young, fell in love, got married, and were planning to spend the rest of their life together until the man suddenly died of a heart attack at the young age of 28 leaving his pregnant wife behind as a widow. Or i can provoke anger by telling you about injustices of the world. But the content is not necessarily effective if its .... just not the right time to feel grateful, angry, or sad, or whatever emotion is trying to be provoked. You know this from crusaders for jesus or Peta warriors who try to provoke you, but you're heartspace is nowhere close to theirs, and so all their provocations draw out is cynical scoffs.

In the same way, my daily attempt at trying to provoke gratitude can be met by my Self with frustration or a 'god this is not working' type of cynicism.

But when those moments come, i'd like to remind my self and anyone who relates to this, that 'this too shall pass.' Maybe time will teach us to trust in that mantra more and more, and we are still too young to comprehend the effects of Time. But regardless, we know it to be at least an intellectual truth, and that can be a powerful purpose to a mantra (tools for the mind, i think it translates...)

So keep on tugging along, and you will reach the top of that hill and the outpour of thankfulness and gratefulness and joy will come.