Wake Up -the movie

Watch the trailer here

This film is about a normal guy who starts seeing things that we don't normally see.

Angels and Aliens

Its entirely possible they exist. But being a good skeptic, i don't believe anything without reasonable proof. Someone once said to me "Atheists don't believe in god because they don't have a reason to." And that must be true. I really really want to believe in aliens, aliens that are more intelligent than humans, that are in contact with us, and that the government is keeping from us because they don't trust that humans will react in a constructive manner beneficial to the economy. I would like to believe that aliens out there have a solution to our energy crisis and are watching us destroy our planet with a worried look on their face, hoping that we'll make the right choice and not use nuclear energy anymore and stop consuming the beautiful planets resources. But i've never seen a spaceship, and i've never been abducted, so i will simply remain hopeful.

But angels, well... I grew up thinking angels were a metaphor for something else, like the voice of Goodness that battles the voice of Self-serving Non Goodness. But goodness, on october 31st, 2010 i was contacted by supernatural conscious beings that i could only describe as angelic, and i described them quite sheepishly to the first few people i encountered. I stopped describing it, because i couldn't do it justice, and there was no point. It was revelation to me, and after that it would just become hearsay. I had to learn to treasure the experience for myself, let alone believe that it actually happened. Memory is a bitch, you know. And when they said 'have faith' I didn't think they meant 'have faith in your memory of your experience' because thats not as simple as it sounds!

I'm here, in a stable state of mind, perceiving with my 5ish senses, wondering if angels are around me and i just can't perceive them. What is the point of that? are they always trying to contact us, but we're too loaded up on high fructose corn syrup and trans fats and sugar and gluten to be able to perceive them? Perhaps our chakras are just too clogged up with environmental stress, or maybe the 4g network is getting in the way.

Maybe I wouldn't be able to handle constant contact. Maybe i can only handle intermittent contact for the purpose of inspiration and faith-material. Yeah, i bet i couldn't handle constant contact. Its like constant excitement and enthusiasm. Its exhausting.

A New Earth

A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose by Eckhart Tolle

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


An accelerator of personal conscious transformation and evolution. I loved it. lots of good exercises and daily practices... moment to moment practices... I wonder if eckhart tolle is enlightened. He certainly knows the mechanics behind it all. Not only was it helpful, though, it was also intelligent :) He made some connections between the international situation (which is desperate as usual) and our individual pain-bodys.

Soon after reading this book, The Power of Now also fell into my hands, and i read it, and its all the same information, but with a few different analogies and less of the societal global context that A New Earth has. I wouldn't recommend this book to anybody, as not everybody is into this sort of self-transformational work. And even eckhart says at the beginning that this book will either be really powerful or it will be meaningless... So if your not into burning up Ego and becoming free of pain body and becoming more conscious of unconscious mechanisms...





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Living the "extremes"

My mom asked me why I always go so 'extreme' and don't walk the middle path more often. "extreme" is certainly relative, and people who live Extreme don't consider themselves to be Extreme. But i considered it.

And rephrased it.

Why, in comparison to my mother, do i seem to be more Extreme?

I always considered Extreme buddhists or Extreme Reborn christians, to come from extreme lives. Usually people who adhered to a strict set of rules to an Extreme degree where of Extreme backgrounds, survivors of abuse, neglect, addictions, what-have-you.

So, based on that consideration of mine, I thought, have i lived a more extreme life than my mothers?

I suppose I have! She grew up in japan, where the concept of 'normal' permeates throughout the culture, and she lived a 'normal' life. She went to school, didn't travel much until she was in her late teens, played sports and music, and had a bunch of peers with whom she could compare herself to and consider herself and her life Normal.

I, on the other hand, traveled around the world twice by the time i was two or three, and even though that was pre-autiobiographical memory, I'm sure it had some effect on me to be exposed to all those different frequencies, at the least on a subconscious level. Then, I lived in different places, never staying in one place for more than 2 or 3 years, rarely feeling like i Belonged or Fit In or definitely not Normal. When i was 13 i remember reading up on a bunch of religions and reading religious texts to see if I could Belong to a Belief System, since i couldnt identify with any Race or Country, and Race, Country, and Religion seemed to be the main Identification Factors for people around me. I couldnt find any religion, so i decided on the religion of atheism... Extreme atheism, in fact, and kept Anton LaVey's 'satanic bible' in my tennis bag as i traveled around the country and the world. I tire of extremism, though, and dabble in many things, though i may dabble intensely and Extremely for a little bit.

So now, when i proclaim that i'm Only Going To Use Cloth Diapers! for my baby, it may look extreme to my mother, but to me, i am ust doing the best that i can with the tools that i have to be environmentally sustainable, consciously aware to the preferences of my child, and not taking any shortcuts just because they 'wont have long term effects'.

I'd like to be much more Extremely present. Id like to be more Extremely healthy. Id like to be extremely connected and flowing with Spirit... You see, Extreme atheism swung right to the other side of the spectrum. Yin Yang reminds me... The waves created by a pebble in the pond create equally low valleys. I experience Extremes because my life experiences have swung me that way.
Its funny... Some of my friends, especially in my san francisco 'conscious' circles consider me 'reasonable' 'balanced' 'grounded'. Its all so relative to the perspectives we are viewing from.

Dreams

Sleeping with a baby has changed the manner in which i dream. Firstly, he wakes me up right as i begin to dream, pretty regularly. So i remember my first dream. Last night my first glimpse into my dream was my friend Big Johns leg was amputated up to his knee and he had a red cataract in his eye, and he was grumpy as always. But this time i finally felt like he deserved to be grumpy whereas usually i'm trying to encourage him to say "I GET to walk mitzy today" instead of "i have to walk mitzy today."

Anyway, besides that specific dream, i also wake up right before my babys late night feeding. our cycles must be harmonized in some way because after i wake up its usually within a few minutes he wakse up to be fed. So in the middle of the night I recall my dreams. They're... not fragmented... but... they run in chapters. Sequels.

Most dreams are insignificant and recycling material from the days past. And i forget those. But i do remember the places and people that i saw whom i enjoyed seeing in my dreams, and i also remember releveant i nformation.

Dreams are so much fun. Its a shame that so many people ignore them.

I want real psychic abilities

I have had occasional psychic insights, but i'm not psychic all the time. I'm lying here next to my 5 month old and he's asleep, and i see that his consciousness is at work. dreamtime is technically the most accessible psychic realm, in my opinion. So the first thing i have to do is... i have to really believe that its actually possible. Sure, i say that i believe in the psychic realm, but if i really believed in it, wouldn't i be more actively pursuing contact with it!?

What should i do to be more active? Meditate more... But not in the way i meditate now, which is Qi Gong, and moving energy around. Thats one form of meditation which is getting me in touch with my meridian circuits, becoming more able to feel them flowing and clogging and flowing again. A psychic meditation would probably consist of... third eye meditations... getting in touch with the cosmic realm of all that is, and the oneness... The time and place where all is known.

Ok. Done. I'm going to begin activating in that direction now. In this way, i'll begin to really believe that its possible and hopefully start to experience it.

fall 2010

Hi. its been a year since starting this blog. i've learned a lot, it seems, and the posts from last summer seem immature. I hope ti say the same thing about this post next year.

What have i learned?

*sigh*

1. There is undeniably (for myself) more to consciousness than i was aware of. I have yet to (re?)experience the absolute

2. i project my thoughts and feelings onto the world, yet i am not these thoughts or feelings. i am the awareness with which i observe my thoughts and feelings. i have been practicing becoming a master of them for almost one year now, and its a difficult but exciting journey and i can see the progress in my head talk... yet still looking forward to more.

3. magic is real, so don't be afraid to dream the unimagined. Fear of unfulfillment is no reason to not dream big. Dream for the sake of dreaming and work for the sake of working... and not for the fruits thereof.

4. babies are kinda cool!! signs and gestures, psychic empathy, and watching new discoveries being made... holding a tiny hand while breastfeeding, while he makes little tired noises...Love itself and the things i love are two sides of the same coin. impermanence does not hurt.

What is not quite true yet but which i intend to be true soon:
-I am patient for the future and am completely present, savoring each moment and exploring this moments experience.

-i recognize and accept my own humanity and that of others. everything is perfect all of the time.

-i dont ruminate on the past or project undesirables onto the future.